Questions….

Wanting to ask questions

But having a hard time grapplin’

With answers

That I thought of

That I should really get rid of

But can’t

Cuz

That’s just how my life goes

Going back and forth

Between the two that in my head

People don’t understand

They say

“Get that outta your head”

I can’t

I try to shake it off

I really try to ignore

All the possibilities

And outcomes

That couldve

Would’ve

Or

Should’ve

Happened

But

It’s all there

Sitting and Waitin

For the mistakes

And

It wants me to fail

It won’t me to not give in

“Give up!”

and

“Let go”

Saying stuff like

“You are not going to win!”

Battling between the two

Hoping that I wont lose

But it’s kinda pointless

Hoping for something

That will never change

Because this what I battle with everyday

Struggling with the two

Pulling me in all kinds of directions

Kinda like the elections

No matter what side you choose

You are bound to lose.

Sorry to say

But it’s true

So what am I suppose to do?

I got all these questions

And I know I am ready to ask them

But it’s not that quite simple

Cuz

I deal with two

Depression

And anxiety

Depression makes me want to scream it out loud

While anxiety makes me want to hide it feom the crowd

Weird, right?

It should be the other way around

Yet it’s not

My stomach is always in knots

I try to face em

Tell them

That I can win

That they can’t hold me back

Yet

I gotta do more than that

But I must be, right?

Right?!

Cuz it’s MY life….

And they are just trying to make feel as if I’m not inside….